Twelve
by EmelineCarter92
Summary: A series of one shots. With Clara and Twelve. Clara is still finding it hard to accept this Doctor, despite her being destined to save him. How will their realation ship grow? The Doctor wants to move on but something is making him hold on to this now 'ordinary" girl.
1. Safe and Sound

After getting the kids off to school, Clara went back into the kitchen and made two cups of coffee. Two, because she had seen the blue box on the corner. Then as if on perfect timing, the door bell rang. Smiling to herself Clara went to the door, partially skipping. As a thought struck her, she straightened her composure, and opened the door, slowly. He was wearing a t-shirt and a tan jacket. His black hair perfectly straight, instead of floppy, like she was used to seeing. It stuck up in the back though. She fought a smile as he stood there, incredibly patient.

"Can I come in then?" He asked.

She stepped aside and let him in. While she continued to make the coffee he just stood in the middle of the room.

"Mind if I sit down?"

"No, go ahead." She thought that odd. He didn't have to ask her these things. Did he feel like an unwelcome guest? He sat down at the kitchen table. She brought the two mugs over to him, setting one of in front of him.

"What's with the..." He motioned to the two cups.

"Coffee? I was wondering when you would ring. Don't think I didn't notice." Clara looked at the magazine in front of her when she felt his eyes on her.

"Hello?" A familiar voice rang out. Angie came back into the kitchen, followed by Artie.

"What are you doing back. You're not ditching again."

"Relax. I forgot my books." She went over to the Island and grabbed them, stuffing them into her backpack. "Who's he, you're new boyfriend?"

"That's the Doctor. He changes. That's what he does, remember." Clara said.

"You told them?" The Doctor asked.

Clara just shrugged.

"Still thought you'd be taller." Angie said.

"That can't be right. Thought you grew a couple of inches." The Doctor put his hand flat on Angie's head and drew his arm back. She came up to his chest. "No, wait,you're still short."

"I'm a kid. I'm supposed to be short."

"ow old are you Angie? 37?"

Artie laughed.

"I'm thirteen." said Angie, trying hard not to laugh too. She rather liked this Doctor better.

Artie was still laughing. "He talks funny,"

"Go on, get to school." Clara shooed them toward the back door. "If your dad hears you've missed the bus again you won't be the only ones in trouble." After shooing them out, Clara sat back down at the table. The Doctor was already seated, his arms crossed, leaning back in the chair, feet on the edge of the table. His former lanky form would not have been able to do that. His eleventh regeneration had been like a uncoordinated house hat. He'd probably would have fallen out of his chair by now. "You want to talk about something."

"You called me pretty, like before with the cyberman, when the cyber planner.."

"You want to talk about..before?" He didn't want to talk about his former self with her. He had to move on. But he was still holding on to her.

"No." She felt she couldn't share certain things with this man, things she shared with the other him. "I shouldn't have brought it up." She paused.

"I just look different, and act different. Bu' I'm still him. Buried underneath, it's still there, if you look 'arder."

"I don't want to look." She found herself afraid to look any further. There would be loneness, loss, and sadness, and guilt, all that weight. He was truly older somehow, more...grown up. On the outside he looked psychically older than his previous life but not too old. She'd have to peg him at thirty-four, thirty-five maybe. She was twenty-five. "I don't know if I like this you yet." She blew on her coffee and took a sip. He leaned forward, his eyes menacing.

"I think you're lying." A smile spread across his face.

Despite smiling back, Clara felt a chill creep up her spine. "Have you been her all night?" He avoided her question and her gaze. He lifted the mug to his lips and drank, no doubt stalling while he tried to formulate an answer. A moment past before he met her eyes again, resignation that he couldn't evade her question after all.

"Well, I wasn't 'ere all night. And I didn't actually sleep."

"That wasn't necessary." Clara said. "But thank you."

"Thanks for the coffee." He responded.

"It's the least I could do."

A heavy sigh purred through his chest as he swallowed another sip. Displeasure flashed on his face before he pulled his 'poker face" back up. Was it from the coffee or something else? He set the mug down, eyeing her. She thought she could see his tiredness and exhaustion, his eyes were too serious. She realized she must be a pain in the rear and could even drive the bravest of men far away. But still. "You didn't have to do that."

But he did. "It's just my job. To keep you safe."

"Who's job is it to keep you safe?" He just smiled but it faltered a little. "I'll tell you." She said, leaning forward. "It's mine, and anyone else who walks through your doors."

"I don't need to be saved. You can't save me this time Clar-a Oswald. No one can."


	2. Handy Man

The Doctor was fixing the TARDIS console by hand. He mentioned something about, fixing the camelion circuit. It instantly sparked. "Why do things always do tha'?" When he tried to fix things, without his sonic screwdriver it ended up sparking or exploding.

"That's just you." Clara said with a smurk.

_Hours later..._

Clara impatietly paced around the TARDIS. "How much longer, Doctor?" She glanced at the Doctor who was studying a row of dials and read outs.

He anwsered her without looking up, "oh, any minute now, pprobably."

"Shouldn't you be steering or something?"

"No, need for tha'. I pre-set the co-ordinates."

"Yeah, but where? The dark ages, Ancient Rome? WWIII?"

"Oh, Clar-a. Ye have lit'le faith. We may have had the ocasional blip or hiccup. There was tha' buisness with Mt. Vesuvius. that was a long time ago. Shan' happen again. Shouldn't. Is that the correct word. No? The TARDIS is pretty reliable these days. Only had to tap her twice in the last few trips. Camelion circuits still faulty. Might take a few days. I did fix it once though I could never find her, if you can' remember what the TARDIS looks like." He was back at the controls now staring at the same set of dials.

"Oh, please. You forget where you park her sometimes."

"Eh, I'm old. I'm not getting well up in years."

"I'm just saying, The Doctor and technology, don't mix." She walked around to the other side of the console. "That you got from me too."


	3. Somethings Stay the Same

Discription: The Doctor and Clara try to find out the secret behind a deadly drug that eats it's victims from the inside out. One of the victims deaths is fixed.

* * *

"How?" The Doctor's gaze slid away from her. He just shrugged.

That infuriated her. "Don't you care?"

"When you see death as much as I 'ave, it doesn't phase ye anymore."

"But..he's not dead yet."

"Clar-a..."

Clara shoved back from the kitchen table and crossed to the coffee machine. She slammed her mug down, but when she finshed stirring in the sugar, she turned and leaned against the counter, glaring.

Their last trip, to Victorian London, (he actually gotten it right that time.) Vastra had told her that the Doctor was uncable of love.

Clara didn't believe that was true. She saw that there was so much love in that man. He just chose to hide it. He was vulnerable. She used to be able to see it. Her Doctor never shared anything with him. Thisi Doctor from the beginning was more open with her, but at times he shut her out.

"Done?" The Doctor asked.

Clara just sipped her coffee.

"I know what you're thinking."

"So don't even ask right? Don't even try to save another person's life? I don't know if you noticed, Doctor but it's in my nature to at least try. You used to be like that."

He shoved his own chair back and took his mug to the sink. She edged over slightly and when he set the mug down, none too gently either, he turned to her for a long stare off. Shoving his hands into his pockets he said, "I need ye to trust that I know wha' I'm doin. This is the job and yeah, it rubs that some kid's head got so jammed up that he's not going to know what he's lost until it's too late. But that's the human conditon, and this death is preordained. Don't fight me on this."

Clara's shoulders slumped, but she placed her coffee on the counter and squared on him too. "I don't want to fight either, Doctor. But this man could be dying right now and we're just sitting here talking...drinking like.. like it has nothing to do with us."

"It doesn't."

"It does." She implored, leaning foreward, forcing his gaze. "It did the minute we learned about it. Id you know someone is about to die, and you don't try to help, then you're culpable. You're complicit!" "No." He must have realised how cold it sounded because he shook his head. "Death isn't a barrier to be knocked down. It's just a threshold that everyone needs to cross." "Tell that to the guy who is about to be murdered."

"It's not a murder this time."

"So his death could still be preventable?"

"You ever try saving a man from himself? It'd be easier to force a river to flow in the opposite direction." Striding back to the console room, he brought up a file on the monitor. As Clara studied the screen, she felt horror roll over her face like a shallow wave. only ninteen years old. His stats were all there, his date of birth and his date and time of death.

"He's just a kid. That is someone's child."

"Yeah and he threw all that good work into the worlds dumpster."

"I agree that he made bad choices. But so is letting him die." Before she knew, her mug shattered against the console. The Doctor looked down at his previously white shirt.

"I need to wash up."

"Yeah because you have to at least look flawless on the outside." Clara snapped back. Then she imediatly held up her hands, "I'm sorry. I am. You didn't deserve that."

The Doctor hesitated, then returned to her side. "Let me ask you something. What happened to your left knee?" Frowning, she wrapped her robe tighter around her, looking down at her exposed knee. He reached down to put his hand on it. She made a futile attempt to slap his hand away. "There's a mark to the left of the kneecap that's smoother and shinier than the rest of the skin."

"I fell when I was six." She said. "My dad was teaching me to ride my bike but I hit a pothole and had to get tweleve stiches."

"And why is it raised like that?"

"Because it's a scar, Doctor." She said, impatiance brimming in her voice.

"Because that's what happens what happens when you injure your body."

"It's part of the human condition."

"Wan'a know what happens when you scar your soul? You can't feel anythin outside your own pain, not for what it really is. The interanl anguish is so great that it cripples you. And that scar tissue dulls your senses to the point where you find yourself wondering if you're able to feel anything again." For a brief moment, Clara wondered if he was talking about himself. Then he looked at screen again, showing it to her. "This man..."

"Boy." She corrected.

"Soul." The Doctor retorted sharply. "Is already that injured. Something big and crippling scarred him in his past and each breath he takes adds new engery to the old. By now, he likely feels nothing at all, and that's no way to live."

Clara studied the photo for a long moment but finally shook her head. "I lived. You saved me."

"You were different. You were slated to die because I put you in harm's way, not because you were scarred."

"You have scar tissue too, you know." She wasn't angry anymore,just making an obsservation. "Maybe I need it to do this." She nodded. She studied him for a long time. "Just...hold on." Edging passed him, she disappeared down a corridor. Seconds later she reapeared with a hat box. "I got this for you. I was going to wait until your brithday."

"How do you know when my birthday is?"

"I was in your time stream. Even aliens have to have birthdays." She shrugged. "Open it." He just stared at her.

"I can't remember the last time anyone gave me a gift." He said at last, then he busied himself, hidding his pleasure.

"It's a hat." Clara finally said.

The Doctor looked up. "I have plen'y hats."

"I know but this one's special." She touched a button along the brim's edge and a red light appeared, accompanied by a high pitched chirp. "They normaly fashion them in baseball caps and cowboy hats, and I know you don't do those, so I had this one custom ordered in a stingy brim. You like?"

The Doctor frowned."Why is it bleeping?"

"Because it has a built in compass. You program your co-ordinates, and the closer you get, the louder and quicker it beeps." "You want me to wear a hat tha bleps?" Clara folded her arms. "Is this a guy thing? Like asking for directions when you're driving?"

"It's a hat. That. Bleeps."

Sighing Clara reached out and took the fedora from his hands, then plunked it atop his head. "Just wear it. It'll give you a piece of mind."

"That'll find my way, since according to you I always get us lost."

"No." Her hand lowered to caress the stuble ofhis cheek, and she tilted her head up. "That you'll find your way back to me."

The Doctor slipped his arms around her and kissed her on the forehead. "I love your passion, Clar-a. I love how you can feel so much for a total stranger. It makes me bet'er" She looked up at him. "It does. It helps me rember what it feels to be alive. Do this long enough and you can grow numb to the emotion of both. But don't you allow me to do tha. Don't let me push you away."

" I love your passion to." She said, lifting on her toes, returning the kiss. Her eyes then slowly started to fall to his lips, but he pulled away.

"So, is this thing waterproof?"

Clara frowned, suprised. "I don't think so. Why?"

"I still gotta find my way to that shower."

A smile began to creep on Clara's face. "I think I can help with that"

"Can ya?"

"Beep. Beep." Clara replied. He took her hand, their fingers interwining.

"Beep. Beep, Clar-a." He dropped her hand as she led the way to find the bathroom.

She had part of her old Doctor back. But he was never truly gone. He was after all the same man. Beep. Beep indeed. Somethings just never change.


	4. Walk Away

Clara tried saving the man was about to die, going against the Doctor's rules. She had always listened to her Doctor. But this Doctor took risks, why couldn't she? She liked pushing his buttons.

He didn't get flustered like her Doctor. He got frustrated, like a grumpy old man.

Her Doctor, she was still calling his eleventh self. He was still her Doctor. No matter what face he wears.

He was there, as if he knew what she was up to.

"We don't walk away, remember?" She told him.

"No." He turned on his heels to face her. "You don't walk away. I can."

"You'll alway run. I know you're scared. Please don't run this time."

"Clar-a"

"Don't even try."

He grabbed her by the arm. "You weren't supposed to be 'ere."

"You weren't going to do anything."

"I'm going to do my job."

"It's not a job. He's a person."

"Not anymore."

"You act like you don't care. Does it even matter to you? What happens to me?" She was questioning him, starting at him like he was a stranger. The way they always looked at him when he changed.

Did he care? She contemplated Vastra's words. And his words from earlier. His soul was damaged. How could she possibly fix him?

"Of course it does."

"No, you don't. You'll just go off and find one of my echos."

"We're all echos in the end."


	5. Holding On

"I'm holding on to you Clara. You're my leaf. If I ever let go.."  
"You feel like you'll blow away."  
"I don't want you to blow away, at least not yet. You're the most important human, in human history, my history. Clar-a Oswald, you went from impossible girl, to normal. Nothing really special."  
"Hey!"  
"But you are to me. To everyone else you're just a blip in the Universe..."  
She threw her arms around him. His body was tense and he sort of fidgeted. She felt the urge to kiss him, well she couldn't anyways  
He was her old man. Instead she kissed him on the cheek. "Are you ok?"  
"For right now, I am."


	6. Finding My Way Back

(After an alien invasion.)

"I'm not standing up for her, but I don't blame her either. Besides, a dead woman can still cast a long shadow. If anyone knows that, it should be you." She hadn't meant to say the last part.

"What does that mean?"

"I just meant that your wife's death. It happened a long time ago, but it still haunts you."

"Course it does. But it doesn't cast a shadow over me."

"No. That's not what I meant." Clara looked up at him, "I meant the people around you."

The Doctor's hand fell away. The look on his face so was injured and stunned that Clara wanted to reach for him. But she finally said what's been haunting her.

"Look, what do you think it's like?" She crossed her arms. "To know the man I love spends most of his waking hours thinking of another woman."

"You love me?"

"Not in the way that you think."

" I can't love you, not even in the same way, you do. I'm too damaged."

"Damaged?" He had damaged her, and he well knew it. "I'm not thinking about her all the time."

"No, but you're chasing her down. And sometimes I feel like she's chasing you down too."

"What?"

Clara shook her head. "You say her name in your dreams all the time, Doctor."

"That's what this is about? That's not fair. I'm not even concious."

"Have you ever dreamed about me?"

"I don't need to, you're here."

"Wrong answer." She turned away when his fingers wrapped around her arm. She gave it a violent shake. She shouldn't have let herself get drawn into the conversation, she thought as she strode toward the Maitland house.

"I dun't compare you to her."

"Maybe not conclusivley. But the shadow of her memory is in your eyes every time you look at me. You should at least know that."

That night, Clara couldn't sleep. Who did she remind him of then?

* * *

"You finally made it back." She winced inwardly, hoping she didn't sound naging.

"I had some things I needed to work out." And he couldn't be in two places at once. Clara thought. Could he? No. He'd cross his own time stream. It'd be to much of a risk. But he seemed more of a risk taker these days. "I'm sorry, Clar-a." When she still said nothing, he lifted his fedora and ran his fingers over his hair and sighed. "My head is...screwy."

"I.." She wasnted to say, I understand" or It's ok, or "It doesn't matter." as she always had before, but none of that was true. "I know." Clara finally said.

Edging over, he sat next to her on the sofa, elbows on his knees as he toyed with the stingy brim. "That hat works." A smile slipped onto Clara's lips. "You wore it?"

"I wore it." He connfirmed. He tilted his head, eyes meeting hers. "And found my way back."


	7. Believe

He's heard these words many times before, _"Fight for what you love, and for who you are. It's great to be different. To believe in yourself when no one else does. _

_Sometimes people leave. But that's ok, because once you've met someone, you never really forget them."_

The first time he met Clara was when he 'borrowed" the TARDIS. He hadn't seen her, only heard her. But now he knew it was her. "Doctor." "Yes, what is it? What do you want?" "Sorry, but you're about to make a very big, mistake. Don't steal that one. Steal this navigations knackered but you'll have a lot more fun."

In his dreams he does she her. As much as he sees River.

She's saving him in the Dalek Asylum, dying on the snow covered ground in Victorian London, jumping through his time stream. _"Run, you clever boy, and remember me." _

_ And remember._..Her voice echoes.

He wakes up.

That's all he remembers.

After and up until he died was still blank. The pain was all he remembered. He was numb to everything else but his own pain. It was eating at him. He wanted to through in the towel, give into the darkness that resided within him. But Clara pulled him back, the human race kept him from losing it. He believed in the human race. But for how much longer can they fight off the dark for him? He knew what was coming. He always depseratly had tried to prolong it, even prevent it. How could he believe in himself? Everone did believe in him. All that he had loved, he had lost long ago. He had nothing to fight for. People leave him, come and go. He never forgets them. Billions of people he's saved and seen. The death and loss still piled up. His emotions he tried to burry, were becoming too much. He didn't become better, the older he got. He became worse. But humans did make him better, He had to fight for them. The human race was all he had left. He want to believe he'll be alright. But in reality, he can feel his control slip.


	8. Don't Worry Be Happy

"I wish there'd be more laughter like this." Clara said, her side still aching.

"There will be." He told her, confidence in his voice. He seemed happy. Happiness, a rarity she had seen in her other Doctor.

"You seem happier." She pointed out.

"I am." Without making eye contact, he flipped a switch. Then he turned his gaze up at her. After a moment he approached her. "I've got you."

"What happens when you don't?" She wouldn't be here forever. He had to know that, obviously.

"I've always got you." His hand rested on her shoulder. "But nuthin' beats the original." The other versions of Clara weren't her, not really. She was there, always, watching out for him all his lives. Now in his twelfth form, he felt further away from his other incarnations. He didn't feel like the Doctor at times when she wasn't there. He wondered if it had to do with what he'd become. It was inevitable. He didn't improve with age. He got more vulnerable, vulnerable to the dark, that resulted from his pain, old wounds re-opening with every loss.

All those years ago, centuries, his first life didn't have all the weight of the dead on his hands, not a single soul. But loneliness had dominated him, his whole life, even from the beginning, a little boy, who was expected to become a potential leader. He had defied their laws. The troubled young Galifreyian boy, with black hair, became a trouble maker, a slacker at the beginning of his Time Lord years. The head Time Lords, even his own family found his potential lacking, that he was a disappointment.

When he had left his home world he had hoped to make something better of himself, prove them wrong. And he did. But he was still lonely, even though his granddaughter, his only family that had the hearts to accept him.

When she was gone, he was truly alone again. All those lonely hours as a boy...

She had to have seen. Clara, watching over him like his own guardian angel.

He was an echo, just as much as her counterparts spread across time.

He wasn't alone now. Perhaps not, ever really. There was always Clara. Always. The thought disrupted his gloomy ones.

Clara had seen his a thousand years, all Eleven faces. She saw everything they did, everything they seen. He was better than when he first started out.

The Eleventh had a sliver of ice in his heart. This one was kind. He barely hid from her. She accepted that. He had his reasons for keeping certain things from her. He was a lot less secretive with her. On several occasions when it was just them he had showed a deep set affection for her. There was a lot of holding, and touching, and kissing involved. Not the adult kissing and touching. It was always in a friendly way, like family. She loved the way he kissed her forehead, touched her face. God, how many times? He looked at her like...she was a divine creation. No other Doctor would have looked at her, the way he did. Nor the feelings that were there for her. He was better. "You do." Clara said.

His hand slid off her shoulder. The expression she received was undetectable, mixed with a little bit of doubt.

She continued on, "You were grumpy and old."

"I am old." He replied, "bu' back then compared to now..." He trailed off.

"Never go back to that, being grumpy. Still be you though but please don't try to act young. It'd be like someone's awkward grandfather trying to do all the 'hip' things kids do now' days."

"Clar-a Oswald. You are the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."

"You said I was pretty."

"Rule 1, I lie..." He turned to the console, then stopped halfway, turning back to her. 'old on, did I just say tha' out loud?"

"The rule or me being..." Clara couldn't finish. She swallowed involuntary as he approached her again.

"Close your eyes."

"Why?"

"Dun ask."

"Ok. No need to get snippy. You're doing the grumpy thing again."

"Just close 'em."

Clara closed her eyes.

"Now open your hand."

Clara opened her hand, waiting patiently. Seconds pasted. Nothing was placed into her hand like she had expected. "Doctor, what are you doing?"

"Wait. Patience, Clara."

"Says the thousand plus alien that has the attention span of a..."

"You can open your eyes now, Clara."

She closed her hand. Before she could open her eyes he opened her closed fist.

"Keep it open."

"Make up your mind then." She got no flustered reply like she would have gotten from Eleven. "Can I open my eyes now?"

"You may."

Clara's eyes opened. Before her he was dangling a key on a black string. Words could not describe what she was feeling. Out of all the things that occurred to her, her palm was still open, the key dangling about it. And she was just standing there. She couldn't imagine what she must look like, like a cat being tempted with a bawl of string. "I feel like an idiot."

"You dun wan' it then? All righ' then."

"Doctor, that's not..."

"I believe this is long overdue." He dropped the key into her hand.

Clara started at it. She was speechless again, unaware he was staring at her, not taking his eyes off her.

He closed her hand tightly around it, causing her to look up at him. A tear escaped her right eye.

"I...I don't know why I'm crying." Now she really felt like an idiot. She reached her hand up to her face.

"ere let me." He wiped it for her, with his thumb. He wiped the tear away, not in a way a lover would but like a father or a grandfather, comforting. "You're cryin because you're 'appy." He turned away from her, back to the main controls. "Since she doesn't like you much an' she locks you ou' and...stuff."

The TARDIS lights dimmed. The ship admitted two rhythmic thumping sounds.

Both of them watched the light show, as the lights dimmed up and down.

"Looks like she's beginning to like me." Clara said, smiling.

"I think he's not happy, actually." The Doctor said. He leaned over the console, stroking it, whispering what unmistakably sounded like, "We'll talk la'er."

Clara gave a laugh. She'd love to stay for that 'talk" but she really was beat. "Well I'm off to bed. Night you two."

She went off down the corridor to find her bedroom, if the TARDIS hadn't switched it around on her again.


	9. A Thousand Years

Discription: Clara leaves a poem in a famous singer's dressing room.

Based on the song. I do not own the lyrics.

* * *

"You left it in Christina Perries dressing room?"

"It was an accident. And it wasn't a song, it was a poem." When you were being chased by invading aliens you sort of forget things.

* * *

"I see the way he looks at you." Christina said.

Clara's eyes went wide. What 'look' was she talking about? But Clara already knew. If anyone else knew how the Doctor looked at her, there could be trouble. Clara ended up denying that she had noticed. "What?" She asked.

"Like he adores you. Like you're the only thing in the room."

_Heart beats fast. _

Her heart always beat fast when he looked at her that way. But when they were among other people he usually wore a blank expression, occasionally giving her a glance, in that way.

In his time stream she had seen all his colours, all his personalities.

Though he may lie, he keeps his promises.

He had taught her, all of the how to be brave.

When she saw him alone, ,all her doubt goes away.

_one step closer..._to falling in love.

* * *

Time stands still.

She's the most beautiful thing he's ever seen. She had been there since the beginning, longer than the TARDIS had been. He had saved his life millions of times, never noticed her. He notices her now. And realizes. The TARDIS doesn't like Clara, not because she's impossible, but because she knows, and she's jealous. Clara is truly the most beautiful thing to him. She was more part of his life than any companion or lover he had ever had. Right from the start.

He wouldn't have gone out and explored the Universe like he had always dreamed, if it weren't for Clara.

The Universe would have been destroyed along time ago. She lived all those lives, just for him.

No one had ever been there for him like Clara had. He was scared what would happen to him if he lost her ultimately, frightened of a life without her. If she died, all of her echoes would be destroyed. Because he wouldn't need her anymore. But she had always been there. Clara. She was still impossible. Entering his time stream should have torn her apart, yet she had come out alive and intact. But fragments of her other lives still clung to her mind, as well as his other incarnations. She had saved him over and over.

She saved him, again. Risking her own life, for him.

She was brave, always brave.

He'd be brave for her. He had to be.

_I will not let anything take away what's standing in front of me._

_I will remember you, Impossible girl. _

_Every breath,Every hour_

_One step closer...towards salvation._

_That was page one. _

* * *

_I have died everyday waiting for you, _

All her echoes, including herself had waited for him. Her echoes died, but they were still a part of her.

Now she sees all the lives she lived, always watching over him. He didn't see her, not always. But he saw her when he needed to see her. It was like some force had wrapped it's hands around her, keeping her from being shredded from jumping into his time stream.

All that information in her head. All her lives, all of his, all of his lives that will be. His memories of a lonely life. She would let him know he wasn't alone. He always had her. If destiny and fate was real, this was proof.

She had died a thousand times. All versions of her had loved him. She had loved him for a thousand years. And she would love him for a thousand more.

* * *

They went back to the dressing room.

"Sorry to burst in on you like this, Tina." Rather than making eye contact

"You can call me Chris." Christina said to the Doctor. She didn't question his odd behavior because to her it was perfectly normal. But she was growing fristrated that he was going through her things. Having had explained why they were back, though they were last here several months ago.

"That's not more than likely." He threw some sort of manuscript over his shoulder. He had picked it up from the sofa. He paused, "That was probably it." He turned around and bent down to pick it back up.

As Clara and Christina left the room, the Doctor, before putting it in his pocket, he stared at Clara's curvy handwriting. Something about them scrawled across the page. He folded the paper and tucked it into his vest pocket, close to his left heart.

Christina already had copies made and already recorded. She didn't tell them that. The song itself, the words expressed in that song, they needed to be heard. A song about two souls destined to be drawn to each other, that came to life in the melody. Just this song...was meant to be.


	10. Trouble with the Maitlands

Description: Clara has the Doctor meet George (Angie and Atrie's father,) which she eventually wonders if it had been a good idea.

* * *

"Clara, I didn't know you had company." Mr. Maitland said, as he walked into the kitchen. He had just gotten home from work. Clara had a young man with her, though he looked older than her, or possibly could be the same age.

The kids were doing there homework at the table.

"That's Clara's boyfriend." Angie said. The kids still weren't letting it drop. But neither Clara or the Doctor protested. They were used to it by now.

"They spent most of the afternoon up in her room." Artie said, without looking up from his Maths sheet, focusing hard.

"Probably kissing." Angie added with a smile. "And...doing adult things.?"

George gave a curious look.

Angie shrugged."That's what he said they were doing."

"Honestly, we weren't." The Doctor said. They could all tell that he was desperately hiding his embarrassment. George didn't know what it was but he instantly believed him, and that he had no reason to lie.

"I'm George Maitland."

"I knew a George once. He got killed by a cyberman. An' another George who was afraid he had monsters under his bed." He looked over at Clara. "Remind me I should pop in and give him a visit in about three years."

* * *

After that encounter, Clara couldn't imagine what I'd be like if the Doctor met her father. Just a precautionary warning she told him, "Next time let me do all the talking."

"Why?"

"Because you're like one of those socially awkward nerds that live in their mother's basement."

They were at the little roof top cafe, eating inside this time. Clara stirred her cup and took a sip. When he didn't answer, she looked up at him, holding the cup to her mouth, draining it. She set the cup down. "Don't tell me you actually..."

"Did once. Yeah." He was staring blankly, but not at her.

"What do you know, find out something new about you every day."


	11. One Step Closer

He could tell her things, things he could never tell anyone, even River.

He was sitting on her sofa, in her lounge. Not the Maitlands, her Dad's house.

Clara walked in from the kitchen with two cups of coffee. She handed the cup out to him, but he waved it away.

"No, thanks."

"You said you wanted coffee." She said. "Old man can't make up his mind, can he?" She teased him. He was non responsive. Looking at him she noticed he had his thinking face on. "Thinking about something?" She asked.

He pated the cushion next to him. She sat down, setting the cups on the coffee table.

"You. Clar-a Oswald are very brave. I...am weak."

"Don't say that." She wasn't angry. When she said the words her voice was soft, her eyes watered. She saw the tears in his eyes. He had held them back last time. He didn't hold them back this time.

This time he didn't run. Clara instinctively wrapped her arms around him.

"I jus wanna stop, Clar-a."

"I know."

"Bu I just can't, can I?" He pulled out of her embrace. "When you told me you knew I was scared and shouldn't run...you knew then too."

"Knew what?"

"I know what's coming for me."

* * *

"What did you mean you know what's coming for you?"

He didn't answer.

"Doctor."

Still no reply.

"Answer me." She demanded, raising her voice.

The silence was killing her.

"Pretty soon, you won't be here anymore."

"You'll always have me. Even when you can't see me. I'm always there."

"If you die Clara, all your echoes will too. You're connected to them."

"But they helped you."

"That's already happened. It's all..."He waved his hand about. "Timey, wimey."

"Remember that time I was uploaded to the wifi..."

"Your consciousness was still alive so technically you weren't dead."

"You knew all along and didn't tell me sooner?" Before he could reply she continued. "And if you say it was to protect me I won't believe you."

He was silent for yet another moment, his hands clenching a pulley lever of the console, his knuckles turning white. He took another moment to collect himself. He had the nerve to look right at her, with dark expressionless eyes. "I didn't keep it from you to protect you. I did it to protect me."

Clara didn't like that look. It didn't feel right. It didn't feel like it was the Doctor she was looking at.

Suddenly his eyes softened, "I think if I lose you Clara...I think I'll be one step closer. to losing who I am. one step closer to becoming..."

"You think you'll become like him again?" Like his secret that destroyed his people.

"I will."

"No." She said. "No." She was shouting now.

"It's inevitable. It will happen. You've seen it."

"You mean...it's him? The trial on Gallifrey..."

He didn't answer her any further. He didn't need to.


	12. Chapter 12

**AN: Based on the Shroud of Sorrow novel with 11 and Clara. But with 12. I own nothing. This is supposed to be Chapter 3 but for some reason I can't move it. Not going to delete all the stories and re-upload. **

* * *

She still wasn't used to him. He was a bit moody at times, blaming things on her. Well there was that one time that it was technically her fault.  
"That." barked the Doctor, was all your fault." He tore off his sopping wet blazer, then stomped back to the console.

Clara followed close behind, "What do you mean, my fault?'  
The Doctor furiously typed co-ordinates into the keyboard. "I was really enjoying tha' and you..you made my scarf all soggy."  
"At least you're clean. Half an hour ago you were completely covered in dirt. We both were."  
"It's Archeology. You're supposed to get dir'y. It's part of the fun."  
"Well, it didn't feel like fun to me."  
"And you made sure we all knew tha' didn't ye?" He raised his hands, opening and closing his fingers,as if operating puppets. "Oh, Doctor I'm so bored and my jeans are getting all muddy." One hand mimicking Clara. "Well why don't you go back to the TARDIS until we've finished." The Doctor hand said.  
Clara glared at one of the hands. "Is one of those supposed to be me?"  
The Doctor raised his left hand. "This one." He glanced from one hand to the other, dropping  
A smile spread on his face.  
Clara laughed. They sounded like a married couple teasing each other. But he was the nagging Husband instead of the wife nagging. "I'm going to change." She turned away, skipping down the steps to the back of the room and starting to strip out of her wet clothes .The Doctor had followed her. "Eh, don't look at me."  
When he realized what she was doing, he turned his back quickly."Sorry."He shifted his eyes,trying desperately fight the urge to look, turning his head to the side."Can ye..."His voice suddenly was high pitched. "do that somewhere else?"  
"Your TARDIS doesn't like me." She was always moving the wardrobe room on her. "So...no." Clara slipped the sweater over her head. "you can look now."  
He took his turn changing his clothes.  
They climbed back up to the console Doctor sat down in the pilot chair. Clara dropped into the seat beside him.  
"I still don't get what I did wrong." said Clara. "All I did was press a few buttons."  
"Exactly."  
For a moment they stopped speaking. The only sound wad the rasping hum of the engines.  
"All right." Clara sighed. "so I pressed the wrong buttons. But what's with the bubbles and the whole sea stinking of avocado?"  
"That's the point." The Doctor got up to change a dial. "No one knows. The Venofaxions are extinct. That's why Professor Holroyde and her team spent several months and a lot of money draining the sea so they could excavate beneath it and find out what was going on." He fiddled with the settings. "That's why I wanted to get involved in the first place. Think about it. An entire world covered in a bubble bath sea. It's fascinating! All we had to do was find a planet popula'ed by thirty-foot rubber ducks and get them together."  
"Don't forget the giant sponge."  
He smiled but his expression quickly fell."What's the ma'er now?" He asked. "I thought we were getting back to normal."  
"We are." said Clara.  
Silence again. The Doctor didn't buy it. Nothing would be normal, at least between them.  
Then the floor jolted with a familiar boom and the console fell silent.  
"We've landed."  
"Where?" asked Clara. "When?"  
"I'm not sure." The Doctor "the time circuits are still all wobbly. They won't be able to give us an accurate reading until I repair them. Untill then, there's only one way to find out where we are...or when." He bounded down the stairs and flung open the doors. "Marvelous. It's a hospital. Just the place for a Doctor."


End file.
